My wife and I recently made a pretty big change. We had been planning for quite a while and the pieces finally came together. After living on the east coast for our entire lives, we got up and left for Minnesota.
Yes, the geography has changed and I’m sure in future posts I’ll examine some of the physical and cultural differences between coastal and middle America. But relatively speaking, the lat/long coordinates that I center my physical presence around may be one of the less significant adjustments between now and any other point in my life. The two most notable changes are as follows…
- I have no full-time job nor am I am trying to get one.
- I am so far away from any friends and family that it is not practical to make plans or commitments with them. (Other than a couple trips a year for family reunions – which I very much look forward to.)
As I read the above points – a dissonance occurs in my mind. I am a person who enjoys hard, meaningful work. I also love my family. Yet I am extremely excited to be essentially unemployed and in minimal communication with everyone that I’ve known in my life (other than my wife). In fact, my wife and I have worked very hard the past ten years to put ourselves into this position.
Why? I am a person who is energized by creating things and exploring curiosities as they come to my mind. I love the unknown for its promise of opportunities. I have so many random people I need to meet and to help out where I can. I have a general set of skills and knowledge that allows me to connect with people in a way that is often interesting and useful to them.
The path I recently left had no time and no energy for anything that I valued. It was the well-worn path of conventional success and responsibility that I have always felt uncomfortable walking down. (I must point out that I have nothing against that path for others – but it’s not me.) With a caring intention, everyone who joins you on that path helps you to become a risk-adverse specialist that plans well for retirement and 2-3 weeks’ vacation per year (if you get 4 weeks, you’ve REALLY made it - 1/12 of your life doing whatever you want!). It was the path I went down to pay off my student loans and hopefully prove to people that may have otherwise worried about me that I can be conventionally successful if I choose to be.
But I have paid my student loans and have had enough success to give myself flexibility (both financially and socially) on what I do next. I don’t regret anything I’ve done the past ten years – I’ve met great people and learned a ton. But it’s enough – time to move on.